Now to anyone who actually reads my blog... which I found out the other day MAY just consist of atleast three people so I guess one of you might stumble across this.... Hi. You are probally getting sick of my massive amounts of free time (in which I should be doing school work) in which I write blogs. And honestly... I kind of don't care if you read this. God has been working in my life a lot lately. This is college. A huge time of growing and a huge time of change. So I have a lot to write about and work through. You are welcome to join me, and you are even more welcome to start writing your own blog so I can read more blogs to fill up the spare time when I am NOT doing school work like I should. Anyway....!
Family Dynamics. Everyone has them. And they are all different. On one of the rare days when I was doing my school work (which I need to start setting aside atleast and hour a day to work on, that's atleast 12 minutes per class) I found out that you can map family styles by just watching thier interaction. Each family has thier own style and flavor and after about 17 or 18 years, you have pretty much got it down. You know how things work.
The problem is, how your things work is COMPLETELY different than how the girl down the street's family works. Some of you may have expeirienced this when you slept over a friends house. Some families are just REALLY WEIRD. Now here comes the fun part. You turn 18, graduate high school, and move out. (in whatever order you please) Whether you go to college, work, or just bum somewhere, there is a pretty decent chance you WON'T be living on your own or even with family for a fairly decent amount of time.
So what is societies answer to this? Let's put them all in huge apartment buildings. You end up with 3-15 18-25 year old girls sharing an apartment or a few small rooms. Not only did you just stick the most unstable people group together in one place but you throw in PMSing and relationship issues and WOW... things get crazy.
But I think that the hardest thing to deal with is... family dynamics. We have a lot of things that make us who we are. What we consider to be rude, what we consider to be mean, what is appropriate, etc. etc. etc. And this is all stuff we learned from our family. For example, in my family it is very common for us all (my 13 year old brother included) to sit and watch That 70s Show. In some families anything more than "Little House on the Prairie" would be considered inappropriate. And then there are the families who have been watching rated R movies since thier kids were five. Throw these kids together with one TV and it is a catastrophie wating to occur. This occurs with interpersonal things too.
In my house you knew that if you said something particularly mean, even in jest... you'd get slapped and no one would think it was very funny. However an occasional swear word (while looked down upon) meant nothing. However I have an apartment mate who grew up in a family where the whole point was to annoy to the point of slapping, and it was family entertainment. However swearing...was something not allowed. Can you see the problem waiting to happen? Roomate annoys too much, gets slapped (atleast we both agree on that), and I swear. In both our eyes we have done nothing wrong but in each others we just broke the sacred rule.
So yeah... learning how to deal with that is tough. Still learning. But sometimes God blesses you with a family that doesn't live that far away, even if you only see them once or twice a month, or even if it's once or twice a year. And sometimes God gives you friends who maybe you don't live with, but who let you be you and are ok with it.
Learning, observing, etc.
(Speaking of learning... just learned that etcetera was etc, NOT ect.... that's why my spell check has been saying I was doing it wrong for years...)
Monday, January 31, 2011
Sunday, January 30, 2011
New Englander
Today I realized some simple things that are never going to leave me.
1. No matter what happens, the best sports teams will always be the Red Sox, the Patriots, and the Celtics... and I hate basketball.
2. Being tough will always be an admirable quality, even to a fault.
3. If you begin to talk badly about my family, I am going to stick up for them. I don't care what you say about me, but don't start about them.
4. Snow is always a part of life. And I'm going to brag about how much more snow I can handle than you.
5. Pride is always going to play a certain part in things. Not bad pride but more like honor. I can admit to faults but inner character and family loyalty will always be important.
6. Swearing to get a point across (when used sparingly and appropriatly) is completly ok.
7. I don't do part time friends. If you are really my friend, this is going to be long term. I don't do casual relationships.
8. I feel what I feel and sometimes I get angry, but I don't do passive aggressive. I'll either get over it or get in your face.
These are just a few of the things I can think of. You see, New England left a huge mark on me. It's a mark you would never notice until you moved somewhere else. And some people might say that these are stubborn bad qualities but I don't think so. I am still just a simple girl who loves God. I want to serve with all my capactiy. But I am also a girl with character and some things make me who I am today. And people who are worth my time and energy are going to look past my pros and my cons and see a friend, and I'll do the same thing. Because it's where we're from, where we've been, what we've done, and what we've been through that make us who we are, and I wouldn't give anything to be generic. Cause God didnt' make me that way.
1. No matter what happens, the best sports teams will always be the Red Sox, the Patriots, and the Celtics... and I hate basketball.
2. Being tough will always be an admirable quality, even to a fault.
3. If you begin to talk badly about my family, I am going to stick up for them. I don't care what you say about me, but don't start about them.
4. Snow is always a part of life. And I'm going to brag about how much more snow I can handle than you.
5. Pride is always going to play a certain part in things. Not bad pride but more like honor. I can admit to faults but inner character and family loyalty will always be important.
6. Swearing to get a point across (when used sparingly and appropriatly) is completly ok.
7. I don't do part time friends. If you are really my friend, this is going to be long term. I don't do casual relationships.
8. I feel what I feel and sometimes I get angry, but I don't do passive aggressive. I'll either get over it or get in your face.
These are just a few of the things I can think of. You see, New England left a huge mark on me. It's a mark you would never notice until you moved somewhere else. And some people might say that these are stubborn bad qualities but I don't think so. I am still just a simple girl who loves God. I want to serve with all my capactiy. But I am also a girl with character and some things make me who I am today. And people who are worth my time and energy are going to look past my pros and my cons and see a friend, and I'll do the same thing. Because it's where we're from, where we've been, what we've done, and what we've been through that make us who we are, and I wouldn't give anything to be generic. Cause God didnt' make me that way.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Becoming an Ephriamite
Ah... It feels so good to be feeling up to write in my happy light blog again. Nothing too serious, just happy and random :) I haven't felt like this pretty much since high school. I miss sitting with 10 or more of your best friends every day. Getting to see them every day, everyone just being together and having random fun. Going to the park, nightgames, ect. I just miss it. Not that college isn't fun but there is no place for you and all your friends to be stuck together, to just escape together, and I find myself stuck in a cafe or my room most of the time and miss just doing things with friends for the heck of it... anyway... I regress.
Oh yeah: DISCLAIMER: This is all my opinion. Not exactly fact.
Back to the point of my blog. Becoming and Ephriamite. For those of you who have litterally NO IDEA what that is, it is simply someone who lives in Ephraim, Utah. In my case it is someone who lives in Ephriam, Utah and regualarly attends Ephriam Church of the Bible. For any of my friends who are not properly educated on the policies and procedures of the Utah countryside, ATLEAST 90% of Utah is LDS. (That is Latter Day Saints, aka Mormon) which means that finding a Bible Church is fairly hard. All born again believers in Sanpete County (which is a VERY large area, over an hour in driving length from end to end) pretty much flock ot this one church. However this church pretty much has three factions. The ever popular Ephriamites, The fabulous people from Manti, and the outliers. The outliers are from various places; Mount Pleasant, Fairview, Fountain Green, Chester, ect... But they are all twenty minutes or more away from the church.
Anyway, Ephriamites make up the majority of the church (I would dare to say 60-70%). And honestly have a slightly different culture than the other groups. While the Manti group is fairly close, the outliers are well just that, outliers. Now I am not saying that we are not one amazing united body in Christ because we are! I love Ephriam Church of the Bible with all of my heart and we are an amazing body in Christ. These are just some things that the chick who is madly in love with anthropology has noticed.
Anyway, I am getting ahead of myself. Honestly I haven't even started the story yet, you just needed to understand my backstory first. (Sorry, but this is going to be a long blog, go make yourself a sandwhich, grab your favorite beverage and come on back, i'll be waiting) So to start this story I need to go back to good old 2007. This is the year I moved to Utah. If you had told me back in January 2007 that I was going to be an Ephriamite I would have looked at you like you had three heads and though you were in some weird sort of a cult. I was just a cute 14 year old girl living in Leicester, MA. Now if any of you know the culture of Massachusetts you know that while we were not near as farm town as Charlton, or as rough and tough as Worcester, we had pretty great elements of both and we definitly had an edge. I lived my life, about a two minute drive, 15 minute walk from my church; Greenville Baptist Church. It was wonderful. In the spring I would walk to youth group, my friends went and it was a weird, but functional family.
During the summer of 2007 I was ripped from everything I ever knew into the foreign land of Utah. I moved into a tiny town called Fairview (which is about a 30 minute drive from Ephraim Church of the Bible, making us one of the furthest outliers) where I was greeted by about 800 sheep walking down the town's MAIN road. It was the smallest thing I had ever seen. You could walk from end to end in less than a halfhour. And you could see the other end of the town when you looked out your front door. Regardless of what you think... talk about a HUGE change.
But I grew to love this cute little town and it's unique offcolor flavor. Anyone who has lived in Sanpete County can tell you that each town has a different mood and flavor. Being the total Anthropolgy geek (why I am not going to school for this!?!) I will explain it to you. Ephriam basically is the hub of Sanpete County. Mainly, because it has the only Wal-Mart for over 50 miles. Oh yeah, it also has the only decent community college in Utah, named: Snow College. They have pretty much the biggest population of the county and act like it. If we pretend that Sanpete County was a stereotypical high school this would be where the smart, preppy, popular kids would be. Wholesome, loved by all, ect. Now little Fairview where my Utah self is from is for all the loner kids who don't quite fit in. I would go as far as to say all the druggies (another town has that claim to fame) it has those who are slightly off color, those who aren't afraid to speak their mind. This also has a lot of the really cool kids like the drama geek or those who just don't blend in. They don't judge, but they don't fit.
So this is where I am. An outlier. A bit unique, but that's ok because I never really did fit in anywhere. I still don't. I would drive to Ephriam atleast 4 times a week to participate in church events. But I was still an outlier. And while the Ephriamites still love you when you are an outlier, there is a lot more out of sight out of mind things going on. And I was ok with this. I never thought I would become and Ephriamite, but as I have said MANY times, NEVER say NEVER.
Now within this group of Ephriamites there is a very special group. I call them collegites. They are part of a fabulous and wonderful college ministry to Snow College. While often persecuted, they don't let anything stop them and are one of the most loving groups, that is when you are a part of them. The collegites have a tendency to be very secluded. (and while this is changing in recent years, it is still the overall tone) The illusive collegite can be found almost always at 96 E Center St. in Ephraim, UT. At the BEST COFFEE HOUSE EVER... the Solid Rock Cafe. They are a wonderful group of people but tend to forget about you if you are not in thier group. It's a group that takes quite awhile to fit in with because they are simply so tight knit. And if you had told me even a year ago that I was not only going to be an Ephriamite, but at Collegite, I would have laughed in your face.
However, after I graduated high school I spent a semester searching and was drawn back by God to become not only an Ephriamite but a Collegite. I now currently live in the Solid Rock Cafe with the other Collegites and honestly loving it. But I will always be an outlier in my heart. And I honestly had no idea that the culture shock from outlier ville to Ephriamite was so different, but it is.
I thought this might just be me but I was talking to a friend who recently made the change from outlier to ephriamite as well and she sees the big change as well. The outliers had a very independant but tight knit group. Anyone could come, anyone could leave, and we cared about you but no one really relied on anyone. We knew you were always there to help, but we mostly did things on our own. Ephriamites are intertwined with every part of thier beings to thier particular subgroup. Every aspect of life is based on that subgroup, such as the collegites.
SO yeah, these are just my observations on my journey to become a Collegite. I would like to end by saying in NO WAY do I condem any of you no matter what group you are in. All anthropological groups are equal and no one has any better way of functioning than another. I love each of you, but sometimes I just don't fit. While I am now a collegite I just don't fit. I don't really fit as an Ephriamite. But I have never really been one for fitting in. We are all one body in Christ, and that can break the greatest bonds.
Oh yeah: DISCLAIMER: This is all my opinion. Not exactly fact.
Back to the point of my blog. Becoming and Ephriamite. For those of you who have litterally NO IDEA what that is, it is simply someone who lives in Ephraim, Utah. In my case it is someone who lives in Ephriam, Utah and regualarly attends Ephriam Church of the Bible. For any of my friends who are not properly educated on the policies and procedures of the Utah countryside, ATLEAST 90% of Utah is LDS. (That is Latter Day Saints, aka Mormon) which means that finding a Bible Church is fairly hard. All born again believers in Sanpete County (which is a VERY large area, over an hour in driving length from end to end) pretty much flock ot this one church. However this church pretty much has three factions. The ever popular Ephriamites, The fabulous people from Manti, and the outliers. The outliers are from various places; Mount Pleasant, Fairview, Fountain Green, Chester, ect... But they are all twenty minutes or more away from the church.
Anyway, Ephriamites make up the majority of the church (I would dare to say 60-70%). And honestly have a slightly different culture than the other groups. While the Manti group is fairly close, the outliers are well just that, outliers. Now I am not saying that we are not one amazing united body in Christ because we are! I love Ephriam Church of the Bible with all of my heart and we are an amazing body in Christ. These are just some things that the chick who is madly in love with anthropology has noticed.
Anyway, I am getting ahead of myself. Honestly I haven't even started the story yet, you just needed to understand my backstory first. (Sorry, but this is going to be a long blog, go make yourself a sandwhich, grab your favorite beverage and come on back, i'll be waiting) So to start this story I need to go back to good old 2007. This is the year I moved to Utah. If you had told me back in January 2007 that I was going to be an Ephriamite I would have looked at you like you had three heads and though you were in some weird sort of a cult. I was just a cute 14 year old girl living in Leicester, MA. Now if any of you know the culture of Massachusetts you know that while we were not near as farm town as Charlton, or as rough and tough as Worcester, we had pretty great elements of both and we definitly had an edge. I lived my life, about a two minute drive, 15 minute walk from my church; Greenville Baptist Church. It was wonderful. In the spring I would walk to youth group, my friends went and it was a weird, but functional family.
During the summer of 2007 I was ripped from everything I ever knew into the foreign land of Utah. I moved into a tiny town called Fairview (which is about a 30 minute drive from Ephraim Church of the Bible, making us one of the furthest outliers) where I was greeted by about 800 sheep walking down the town's MAIN road. It was the smallest thing I had ever seen. You could walk from end to end in less than a halfhour. And you could see the other end of the town when you looked out your front door. Regardless of what you think... talk about a HUGE change.
But I grew to love this cute little town and it's unique offcolor flavor. Anyone who has lived in Sanpete County can tell you that each town has a different mood and flavor. Being the total Anthropolgy geek (why I am not going to school for this!?!) I will explain it to you. Ephriam basically is the hub of Sanpete County. Mainly, because it has the only Wal-Mart for over 50 miles. Oh yeah, it also has the only decent community college in Utah, named: Snow College. They have pretty much the biggest population of the county and act like it. If we pretend that Sanpete County was a stereotypical high school this would be where the smart, preppy, popular kids would be. Wholesome, loved by all, ect. Now little Fairview where my Utah self is from is for all the loner kids who don't quite fit in. I would go as far as to say all the druggies (another town has that claim to fame) it has those who are slightly off color, those who aren't afraid to speak their mind. This also has a lot of the really cool kids like the drama geek or those who just don't blend in. They don't judge, but they don't fit.
So this is where I am. An outlier. A bit unique, but that's ok because I never really did fit in anywhere. I still don't. I would drive to Ephriam atleast 4 times a week to participate in church events. But I was still an outlier. And while the Ephriamites still love you when you are an outlier, there is a lot more out of sight out of mind things going on. And I was ok with this. I never thought I would become and Ephriamite, but as I have said MANY times, NEVER say NEVER.
Now within this group of Ephriamites there is a very special group. I call them collegites. They are part of a fabulous and wonderful college ministry to Snow College. While often persecuted, they don't let anything stop them and are one of the most loving groups, that is when you are a part of them. The collegites have a tendency to be very secluded. (and while this is changing in recent years, it is still the overall tone) The illusive collegite can be found almost always at 96 E Center St. in Ephraim, UT. At the BEST COFFEE HOUSE EVER... the Solid Rock Cafe. They are a wonderful group of people but tend to forget about you if you are not in thier group. It's a group that takes quite awhile to fit in with because they are simply so tight knit. And if you had told me even a year ago that I was not only going to be an Ephriamite, but at Collegite, I would have laughed in your face.
However, after I graduated high school I spent a semester searching and was drawn back by God to become not only an Ephriamite but a Collegite. I now currently live in the Solid Rock Cafe with the other Collegites and honestly loving it. But I will always be an outlier in my heart. And I honestly had no idea that the culture shock from outlier ville to Ephriamite was so different, but it is.
I thought this might just be me but I was talking to a friend who recently made the change from outlier to ephriamite as well and she sees the big change as well. The outliers had a very independant but tight knit group. Anyone could come, anyone could leave, and we cared about you but no one really relied on anyone. We knew you were always there to help, but we mostly did things on our own. Ephriamites are intertwined with every part of thier beings to thier particular subgroup. Every aspect of life is based on that subgroup, such as the collegites.
SO yeah, these are just my observations on my journey to become a Collegite. I would like to end by saying in NO WAY do I condem any of you no matter what group you are in. All anthropological groups are equal and no one has any better way of functioning than another. I love each of you, but sometimes I just don't fit. While I am now a collegite I just don't fit. I don't really fit as an Ephriamite. But I have never really been one for fitting in. We are all one body in Christ, and that can break the greatest bonds.
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